It was May 16, 1975 and I was miserable. I was 23 years old with no idea what to do
with my life. I had a horrible job and
lived alone in a large city where I knew very few people except those I worked
with and they could not be considered friends.
I was rarely home long enough to make friends. I was a traveling field representative for a
company in Jackson, MS. I left the
office each Monday morning heading to different parts of the state with my travel
agenda for the week and usually did not get home until Friday evening. I had a company car, expense account and
traveled all over the state. I would
usually be in a different city and motel each night. That may have sounded exciting initially for
a 23 year old but it got old in a hurry.
Once I would finish work in the town I was in there was usually nothing
for me to do. Each evening I was a
stranger in a strange town. I soon
learned why some traveling businessmen wind up in a bar at the end of each
day. I didn’t drink so I usually sat in
my room channel surfing. Once I was so
bored I ate dinner twice. Hey, I was
young and could eat more in those days and the company paid for it. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my
life but I knew that this was not it.
Most Friday’s I had no reason or excitement to rush home
after work was done. There was usually no
one to meet and nothing to do. However,
this Friday was different. After work I
was going home to see Billy Graham. No,
he was not at my apartment waiting for me.
He was holding a crusade in Jackson.
As a believer I had long been praying and seeking God’s plan for my life
however, I kept coming up empty. Somehow
I had a notion that God was going to speak to me and give my life the direction
I needed through Billy Graham. I was
eager to finish my work and head home. I
was working a few accounts in Memphis.
It was about a three hour drive home to Jackson. I knew I might miss the opening music but I had
grown up in church and knew most of the hymns anyway. Billy was the one I was going to hear.
As I drove down I-55 from Memphis to Jackson it started
raining. “No, it can’t rain. God, don’t
you know I’m going to Billy’s crusade to have a special encounter with you?” He must have heard my frantic prayer
uttered while I was driving because the rain let up and the crusade would go
on. The stadium was wet but packed. I made my way down front. I wanted to be close to the field so I could
be one of the first to ‘come forward’ as the choir began to sing, ‘Just As I Am’ after the invitation was
given. All of my excitement was drowned
in the damp evening as Billy Graham approached the pulpit and announced his
topic for the evening; this was going to be a special message on marriage and
family. It would be especially for those
who are married, soon to marry or seeking to marry. I did not fit any of those categories. I was single with no girlfriend. I didn’t even have the prospect of a date in
the near future. I wanted to leave. If I had not been sitting so close to the
front I would have but it would have been quite embarrassing to be the only
person in recorded history to get up and walk out before Billy Graham even started his message. So I stayed.
To this day I cannot tell you anything about the sermon but I
can tell you what happened. As I write and
recall that evening 43 years later I still get goosebumps. Somewhere in the message I felt a strange
sensation. To this day I have a hard
time explaining or even understanding it but I knew God had reached down and
touched my life. I was already saved but
this was a touch that began my journey to follow a call into ministry. That journey led me to my wife and family with
all the blessings God has given me in the years since that night. No, I did not hear a voice, see a burning
bush or have a vision. But I knew God had touched my life and had
given me new direction and meaning. I wanted
to run out share my experience but Billy was still preaching. I sat there and waited for the invitation
and as ‘hundreds moved forward to profess Christ’ one person ran in the
opposite direction to call someone, a family member or anyone to share the
feeling I was experiencing.
God taught me two important truths that night that shaped my
life and ministry to this day. First, I
learned the significance of a spirit of expectation. God can touch anyone at any time no matter
their attitude, but a spirit of expectation creates a door that God likes to
use. Expectation and faith are blood
brothers. Notice how many times people
were healed by Jesus because they believed He could heal them. See how often he said, “Your faith has healed you.” When you wake each day do you wake
with a spirit of expectation seeking what God has in store for you? Do you go to church expecting to have an
encounter with the living God or do you go because it is Sunday’s habit? Try living with a spirit of faith expecting
Godly encounters on a daily basis and see what a difference it will make.
Secondly, God taught me that it is not always important to
understand Him and how He works. After
years of theological study on a Masters and Doctoral level, I have yet to sufficiently
understand or explain how God moved in my life that night. God is greater than my understanding and
comprehension. He also knows each one of
us individually and how best to speak in our lives. Duh! He created us. So, He deals with each of us according to His
best way to connect with us. Don’t waste
too much time trying to figure how things happened. That is what Jesus scolded Nicodemus for in
John 3. I like the example of Vance
Havner, the country preacher who said, “I
do not understand all about electricity, but I don't intend to sit in the dark
until I do.” As long as your
experience does not contradict scripture trust God by faith and follow where He
leads.
Don’t compare the experience, ‘wisdom’ or ‘helpful advice’
of others above what you know God did or is doing in your life. Jesus healed several blind people. Once he spit on the ground, made some mud
with the saliva, and put it on the man’s eyes and told him, “wash
in the Pool of Siloam”. Another
time He spit on the man’s eyes and put his hands on him. He simply told Bartimaeus, a blind beggar, “Go;
your faith has made you well.” There’s
that phrase again. Jesus dealt with each
as needed. Each person was blind and
given the miracle of sight but in a different fashion. One was not better or ‘more spiritual’ than
the other. The result was the same in
all. Jesus gave them all the same miracle
of sight. Your experience with God may
not be as dramatic or easy to explain as someone else. Don’t be troubled. If you have an experience with the living God
that does not contradict scripture, it may not be something you can fully
understand or explain but don’t let that stop you or discourage you from
following God by faith through your unique life.
Forty three years ago, on a cool damp night at a Billy
Graham crusade, God touched me in a way I have yet to fully understand or
explain however each day I rise and follow His direction by faith. That’s what Paul is saying in Philippians
3:13-15; “Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have laid hold of it. But one
thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I
press on toward the goal to win the prize of God’s heavenly calling in Christ
Jesus. All of us who are mature should
embrace this point of view.” Like Paul, I have not ‘laid hold’ on understanding all God has done and is doing but by
faith, I will continue to ‘press on’ by faith until I encounter Billy Graham
again…in Heaven!
