Now that we have survived the holidays and look forward to the New Year let us not forget that we live in a sin-scarred world where bad thing can happen. Jesus told us that it rains on the just and unjust so I share the following to help you understand and cope when things go wrong.
Laws That Explain Why Things Go Awry
Have you ever received a phone call the minute you stepped outside and
locked the door? Has the phone started
to ring the minute you get into the bathtub?
Certain astute individuals have noticed that such events are not the
exception but the rule. Men like Murphy,
Peter, and Parkinson have made it their lifework to ferret out the operating
principles, the laws that govern the frustrating lives we mortals live. Here is a small sampling of these laws from
Arthur Booch’s book; Murphy’s Law-and
Other Reasons Why Things Go Wrong!
1. Murphy’s
Law: If anything can go wrong, it will.
2. O’Toole’s
Commentary on Murphy’s Law: “Murphy was an optimist!”
3. The
Unspeakable Law: As soon as you mention something, if it’s good, it goes
away. If it is bad, it happens.
4. Nonreciprocal
Laws of Expectations: Negative expectations yield negative results. Positive expectations yield negative results.
5. Etorre’s
Observation: The other line moves faster.
6. Law
of Selective Gravity: An object will fall so as to do the most damage.
7. Jenning’s
Corollary to the Law of Selective Gravity: The chance of the bread falling with
the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
8. Maier’s
Law: If the facts do not conform to the theory, they may be disposed of.
9. Boren’s
First Law: When in doubt, mumble.
10. Ninety-Nine
Rule of Project Schedules: The first 90% of the job takes 90% of the time and
the last 10% takes the other 90%.
Since certain laws of nature such as these are often unavoidable. I find the following diet is very helpful in
coping with the stress that builds up during the day. Please Read and Follow Carefully.
Breakfast Lunch
½ Grapefruit 4
oz. Lean Broiled Chicken
1 slice whole wheat toast 1
cup of steamed spinach
4 oz. skim milk 1
cup of herb tea and 1 Oreo Cookie
Afternoon Snack Dinner
Rest of the Oreo's in the package 2 loaves of garlic
bread with cheese
2 pints of Fudge Royal ice cream Sausage, mushroom
and cheese pizza
1 jar of hot fudge sauce 4
cans of Coke
Nuts, cherries & whipped cream 3
Milky Way candy bars
Late Evening Snack Before Bed
Entire frozen cheesecake eaten directly from the freezer
Remember the diet is designed to help as
stress builds during the day. There are
certain rules to follow that you may find helpful as well.
1. If
you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.
2. If
you drink a diet drink with a candy bar, the diet drink cancels the calories in the candy bar.
3. When
you eat with someone else, calories don’t count if you eat more than they do.
4. If
you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.
5. Movie
related foods don’t have additional calories because they are part of the
entertainment.
6. Cookie
pieces contain no calories. The process
of breaking causes calorie leakage.
7. Foods
‘licked off’ knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of
preparing something. The calories remain
in the main dish.
8. Foods
that have the same color have the same calories. Examples; spinach and pistachio ice cream,
mushrooms and white chocolate. (Note:
Chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other color.)
I hope this gave you a little smile and I do hope you have a wonderful and stress free year!
